What is the one thing a man wants more than anything else? (Even more than sex...) The Answer: RESPECT! (What man wants to sleep with his wife who shows him no respect?)
God created every man to desire respect. Therefore, we, who are wives, are COMMANDED to respect our husbands.
Isn't it interesting God doesn't command us to "love our husbands?" I firmly believe as women, that's what we want. We were wired for love and security. What good is thriving romance riddled in insecurity? In my mind, the two go hand in hand. But men are different. And God is telling us in His Word, our manuals for living, that based on the way men are wired - they desire respect more than love, sex, security, etc...
I once heard one of my favorite authors, Nancy Cobb, co-writer of the Politically Incorrect Wife, say that when a man holds the title "husband," they are to be treated with respect. Not that they always behave in a way that deserves it - but in our behavior and thinking - we are to respect them - simply because they hold the title: husband. This may be a new thought for you, but keep in mind: We will not be accountable to God for our husband's actions, but we will be accountable to God for our actions.
The Bible also says,
Do you want to build your house? Do you want "life" poured into your marriage? Respect is one of the keys to building your house. To changing the tone in your home and reversing the tide of possible destruction.
Build up your husband with your words; your actions; even by the way you refer to him with your girlfriends. Never talk badly about your husband to other people. (This is disrespectful and the Lord sees it.)
Also, don't tear him down with:
- your tone of voice (oh, how our voice tones can be so demeaning);
- your words (resist talking to him like you would your children - you are not his mother, but his wife);
- your facial expressions; the roll of your eyes etc... With every roll of the eyes, you are tearing down your house.
Today's to do: Ask the Lord to show you ways that you are not showing respect for your husband. Do you demean him by the way you refer to him? Do you embarrass him publicly? Do you put him down in front of others? Do you treat him like one of your children? Do you nag him constantly? Be willing to apologize; Repent and start fresh today. There's power in apologies and repentance.
Remember, just as dying to self, this can't be a one-time seasonal change if you want meaningful change in your marriage. Respecting your husband daily needs to become a lifestyle in order to be impactful. Put aside your feelings, make a choice to doing it God's way; and leave the consequences to Jesus. You won't be sorry!
Tomorrow: The dreaded medication: submission.
Are you willing to show up for tomorrow's post? If so, come see the POWER unleashed by having a biblical understanding of what this means and how it works. I would not teach on it if it were not amazingly empowering and impactful!
Love you sweet friend - keep pressing on!
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